Community garden will not grow ‘potted’ plants

I was thrilled to learn we may soon have a community garden, presumably open to all residents and plants of their choice. Does this mean we can all grow our pot in a convenient place with portable toilets? Will this proposal be submitted to the same civic boards that approved the pot dispensaries (which are illegal in 50 of our 50 states) in the first place? Thanks. – Ron

The proposed community garden likely will feature some herbs that will provide health and wellness.

However, you can bet the farm that cannabis will not be one of them.

“We already checked into this,” said Bob Lieb, the driving force behind the project, located on a 1.2-acre parcel at 30th Street and East Sixth Avenue.

The plot is deep in the heart of the libertarian Animas City neighborhood and below the hill at Riverview Elementary School.

“According to state law, even if you have a permit to grow marijuana, you cannot do it in a public place like the community garden. And especially not next to a school. So the answer is, ‘absolutely no,’” Lieb said with a chuckle. “I knew someone was going to ask this question.”

The garden was approved by the city’s Planning Commission last week. It moves to the City Council in a couple of weeks for a final vote.

Garden advocates have pointed out the huge demand for a place where residents can grow their own food.

That sounds like sustainability. And that means Agenda 21.

See? The United Nations is about to gain another sovereign foothold through the cultivation of radishes, squash and pole beans.

But all is not lost for foes of the New World Order. The Planning Commission has required the community garden to have an astounding 23 parking spaces.

So everyone wins.

The sustainability crowd gains a sanctuary to tend organic crops and become less dependent on corporate farming.

Meanwhile, the Agenda 21 folks can take pride. By requiring so much parking at a garden, local government isn’t engaging in liberal social engineering to reduce carbon emissions by making it inconvenient to use fossil-fuel vehicles.

durango colorado

Who couldn’t see this one coming?

The Mea Culpa Mailbag was filled to the brim with reactions from last week’s commentary, “Seniors make sitzmark with season ski-pass fuss.”

The column either delighted or disappointed.

And it also prompted more than a few readers to Google “sitzmark” and find out it’s a depression in the snow caused when a skier falls backward.

The official count was nine emails favorable, four negative and one so bizarre that Action Line had no idea what the person was talking about.

Among the “pro” emails, Dave wrote: “Awesome … my late grandfather would have been proud of your response.” Chuck added: “Huzzah!”

Mandy wrote, “Well said, and something that no one had the courage to say.”

John warned, “I’d keep listening for the creak of walkers and wheelchairs creeping up behind you. It may take these folks some extra time to mobilize.”

The “con” email objected to Action Line’s perceived hostility toward seniors. All decried how the column was “disrespectful.”

The best observation came from a Baby Boomer named Luke, a fan of Durango who lives in San Francisco and reads Action Line online.

“If somebody talked to me the way the author writes, I’d be very tempted to bring some very special forces to bear on someone who acts like the body part that makes sitzmarks,” he wrote.

Well, well. Nothing like a spanking to teach the meaning of respect!

And the most ironic thing occurred Tuesday, the day after Action Line pooh-poohed cheap skiing for seniors.

A snail-mail letter arrived. It was from the AARP, an invitation for Action Line to join the organization for people 50-plus, of course listing all the discounts AARP members enjoy.

Email questions to actionline@durangoherald.com or mail them to Action Line, The Durango Herald, 1275 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301. You can request anonymity if you adhere to Groucho Marx’s classic advice: “I don’t want to belong to any club that would accept me as a member.”