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Bold gulp makes governor the toast of the town

Downing less-than-transparent fluids in the presence of the media is nothing new for Colorado Gov. John Hickenlooper. Here, he hoists Rail Yard Amber Ale with President Obama at the Wynkoop Brewing Co. in Denver last July. Given the choice between Rail Yard and “Animas River Amber Amalgam Ale,” the former would be the better selection.

If Gov. Hickenlooper is willing to drink water from the Animas River so soon after the toxic spill, what else is he willing to drink? Is he available to hire as entertainment for my next social function? – Tom

Rather than “hire” the governor for your upcoming shindig, why not simply invite him?

There’s a handy form on the governor’s official website. Just go to https://www.colorado.gov/governor and click on the “Meeting & Event Requests” link.

Fill out the form, answer a couple of question and submit.

Keep in mind, however, the governor is a really busy guy, what with being governor and all. Chances are he’ll politely decline.

“We greatly appreciate each request,” the website reads, “but due to the enormous volume of requests received, Governor Hickenlooper is not able to accommodate each of them.”

So this isn’t a “let’s have the governor over for burgers this weekend” kind of thing.

The governor’s scheduling office will RSVP six weeks prior to the requested appearance at your event or meeting.

Even then, plans can change in the blink of an eye, as we saw in the case of the Gold King Mine’s disgusting discharge.

John Hickenlooper was Johnny-On-The-Spot, clearing his schedule to be in town, see the Animas River firsthand, listen to concerns and offer the power of his office.

Then there was The Moment – when Gov. Hickenlooper took a bold stand for Durango and La Plata County. He defiantly raised a bottle of river water and downed it.

“If that shows that Durango is open for business, I’m happy to help,” he said.

As the co-founder of Denver’s famed Wynkoop Brewing Company, Gov. Hickenlooper knows a thing or two about beverages.

He’s ingested far thicker, stronger and murkier fluids than “Animas River Amber Amalgam Ale.”

Let’s hope that the governor’s gallant gulp becomes the “shot” heard round the world to replace the sad image of an orange river.

Our governor walks the walk and quaffs the quaff.

So raise your glass for a toast. Here’s to Hickenlooper, Colorado’s big, bad chief executive.

Oh, and Action Line called the governor’s office on Friday to see if ingesting an impromptu elixir resulted in a case of dyspepsia or the development of mysterious superpowers.

There was no official word by the end of the day, but we know the governor is doing swimmingly. He had a full day of appointments, meetings and functions in Denver.

But Durango and the Animas River are still front-and-center, as the governor immediately announced the good news from state and local health departments: The Animas River has reopened and water is “not a concern for human health during typical recreational exposure.”

We’ll drink to that!

H H H

The Mea Culpa Mailbag has a colorful correction.

In last week’s column, there was a reference to the city’s list of undesirable trees as a “rouges’ gallery.”

As we all know, “rouge” is a ruddy facial cosmetic while “rogue” is a scoundrel or renegade.

Our good friend Todd Ellison saw the irony. “What a fun typo in yesterday’s article about the red leaves: ‘a rouges’ gallery,’ ” he writes.

“I think what was intended was a rogue’s gallery – but one can picture the rouge being rubbed on those leaves to turn them a bit more red.”

Action Line is blushing but will keep a rosy outlook after that rogue appearance of rouge.

That certainly was a cheeky explanation. Good thing there’s spell-cheek.

Email questions to actionline@durangoherald.com or mail them to Action Line, The Durango Herald, 1275 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301. You can request anonymity if you curtail listening to heavy metal music while driving along the Animas River.



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