After walking around downtown Friday night, one question nagged my conscious. Shouldn’t the city have to pay 10 cents per plastic bag to cover the parking meters? – Just Sayin’
The bagged meters are the city’s Christmas present to the petulant parking public.
Some 1,000 old-school parking meters will be replaced in the coming weeks with solar-powered, high-tech ones. So the city covered the meters and declared a parking holiday through Dec. 29.
Free parking is a nice way to promote shopping and commerce downtown.
But how ironic that Durango uses plastic bags to promote shopping when only a few months ago, the city was all in a tizzy to charge a fee to use bags for shopping.
Mrs. Action Line pointed out the obvious benefit of single-use plastic parking bags.
They will prevent the spread of E. coli when people feed the meter. Feed the meter. Get it? (Sigh.)
H H H
A while back, an injured deer was in my yard. So I called dispatch. Long story short, a police officer came out and had to put down the animal. After the deed was done, the officer said the cops don’t haul dead deer and that I should call the DOW. The wildlife people said they don’t pick up carrion either. And you can’t put dead animals in the city trash. Finally, I cajoled someone into removing the carcass, but it still nags me: What are we supposed to do? – Rod Barker, or sign me, “Deerly Departed”
Your carcass conundrum provoked a lively discussion.
Durango Police Chief Jim Spratlen was the first responder. “Eat it,” he said matter-of-factly. “That’s what I’d do.”
But Chief Spratlen acknowledged that not everyone knows how to field dress a euthanized muley sprawled on the lawn. He deferred to Colorado Parks and Wildlife.
Our friend Joe Lewandowski, the agency’s spokesman, offered some good news.
“We do have a list of people who will take the animal, butcher it and harvest the meat,” he said. The number to call is 247-0855.
Be aware that this is for fresh meat only, as in within a few minutes of moving on to greener pastures and certainly not anything expired for several hours. Typically, harvesters deal with roadkill but yard-kill would work also.
And speaking of roadkill, Joe added that if your vehicle strikes a game animal, you can butcher it yourself as long as you let Parks and Wildlife know about it within 48 hours. “We like to keep track,” Joe said.
He reaffirmed that his agency doesn’t haul dead things. The Colorado Department of Transportation will pick up crunched critters or drag them from the roadside if they were hit by a vehicle. However, CDOT doesn’t make house calls.
Having the “deerly departed” in your yard could be a blessing or curse. If you see an opportunity for a full freezer, just make sure you know what you’re doing, Joe cautioned.
“This isn’t the supermarket,” he said. “It’s not like trimming a steak.”
H H H
A question came up at the Steaming Bean the other morning. What if you fill your coffee cup half way with half-and-half, would that be a quarter-and-quarter? Or would those three halves total one and a half? – Too Much Caffeine
Your question blurs the line between math and philosophy.
Say you were driving on 32nd Street on the 16th day of the month listening to Beethoven’s 8th while drinking your fourth cup of half-decaf. Would that make your life whole even though it only adds up to 31/32ths?
And what if you see your cup as being half empty rather than half full?
We’ll just have to split the difference.
Your best option: Switch to organic almond milk.
Email questions to actionline@durangoherald.com or mail them to Action Line, The Durango Herald, 1275 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301. You can request anonymity if you remember Steve Martin in ‘L.A. Story’ saying, ‘I’ll have a half double decaffeinated half-caf, with a twist of lemon.”
