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Don’t be at loggerheads with trucks lumbering through town

Beetle-killed Engelmann spruce are being salvaged at a 515-acre sale area on Middle Mountain above Vallecito Reservoir, the Forest Service said. About three to six loads of logs are expected to be harvested daily, with the logs being transported northward to a mill in Montrose.

I bet there are a lot of Durangoans wondering about those large log trucks rolling along Camino del Rio and north Main. Where are the trees from and where are they going? Are they beetle-kill to make house logs, firewood or toothpicks? I tried chasing down a log truck one day but they were on a mission heading north. – Bill Koons

Thanks for logging your concerns with Action Line, a sap who pines for such questions with which to needle the local branch of the Forest Service, or perhaps stump it altogether.

But our good friend Devin Wanner, acting public affairs officer for the San Juan National Forest, didn’t have to go out on a limb to figure out the tree source.

So here’s your truncated explanation of felled timber.

Or would that be “trunk-ated?”

Be that as it may ...

Crews are salvaging beetle-killed Engelmann spruce at a 515-acre sale area on Middle Mountain above Vallecito Reservoir, the Forest Service said.

About three to six loads of logs are expected to be harvested daily, with the logs being transported northward to a mill in Montrose.

There, the logs will be cut into dimensional lumber and studs.

The harvest will continue until the snow gets too deep.

Lumberjacking will resume in spring but not until the site dries out, the Forest Service assured those who might bark about the situation.

For all the gals and “fellers” tired of log-truck traffic, you’re not out of the woods quite yet. The salvage operation will continue through 2021.

Action Line hopes everyone “copse” with the presence of timber-toters.

“Chasing down a log truck” is not a good idea, especially if you have an ax to grind.

It’s a case of not seeing the forest for the trees.

•••

And now for a quick ride on the Action Line Mea Culpa Mailbag delivery truck:

“Great piece on speed bumps and humps,” writes loyal reader Jim Burpee about last week’s column. “But why didn’t you acknowledge another speed-reduction method recently reported?” Jim asks.

“It was the one about a lady who sat in a lawn chair pointing her white hairdryer at speeders to get ’em to slow down.”

Jim was referring to the Patti Baumgartner of South Finley Point, Montana, who achieved some notoriety as “Granny’s Got a Speed Gun.”

For her stylish solution to a hairy problem, the Montana State Patrol awarded Patti with an honorary “trooper” title and a sticker badge.

Speaking of traffic, another loyal reader, Rick Feeney, saw serendipity when Action Line suggested a couple weeks ago that we send bad local drivers to quaint Mackinac Island, Michigan, for re-education and multi-modal rehabilitation.Mackinac Island is where motorized vehicles have been banned for 121 years.

Until Vice President Mike Pence showed up.

On the same day the column appeared, there were snarky dispatches from the tourist hot spot showing the veep’s eight-SUV “motorcade” going on a Very Important Mission.

It was a one-mile slow roll from an historic hotel to the local airport.

Most pooh-bahs take a horse-drawn carriage for that 5,820-foot journey.

The funniest part is a spectator’s video of the security detail.

It shows two state police officers leading the procession.

They’re wearing short pants and riding mountain bikes.

“This isn’t a coincidence, your reference in today’s column, is it?” Rick asks. “Nah, of course not!”

Email questions to actionline@durangoherald.com or mail them to Action Line, The Durango Herald, 1275 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301. You can request anonymity if you attend Action Line’s annual autumnal hortus hortatory oratory, aka “The Bulb Talk.” It will be at 9 a.m. Saturday at the La Plata County Fairgrounds. The big shebang kicks off the Durango Botanical Society’s spectacular sale featuring 10,000 bulbs. Talk’s at 9 a.m. and the sale will start at 10 a.m.