Copies of the Snowdown Sneer, an annual publication dedicated to perverse reporting about affairs in Durango and beyond, appeared all over town Monday morning.
This year’s edition announced the United Nations had invited newly elected state Rep. J. Paul Brown to address the General Assembly; that Silverton had proudly embraced pollution-based tourism; and that Durango City Council members are now marketing “collectable ‘bobblehead dolls’ of themselves,” thanks to “sky-high approval ratings.”
The satirical, anonymously written publication also notes that new La Plata County Sheriff Sean Smith will give out kittens whenever it issues concealed-carry weapons permits in keeping with Smith’s promise to make it a “kinder, gentler department.”
Meanwhile, after reviewing the district’s test results, Durango School District 9-R Superintendent Daniel Snowberger is pushing forward with a new brave policy: more testing. Pick up a Sneer at various places downtown.
Light parade will alter Main Avenue traffic
Traffic will be diverted Friday afternoon and evening in downtown Durango to prepare for the Snowdown Light Parade at 6 p.m. on Main Avenue.
The details:
Crews and equipment with police escorts will be setting up barricades in lanes of traffic on Main Avenue, between Fifth and 12th streets.
The 500 block of Main will be closed at 2:45 p.m. Also, Fifth Street will be closed from Main to East Third Avenue.
Beginning at 3:45 p.m., Main Avenue traffic from College Drive to 13th Street will be detoured to Narrow Gauge Avenue or East Second Avenue. City crews will be setting up the Snowdown Light Parade pedestrian barricades at that time.
No parking will be permitted on Main Avenue and on Narrow Gauge from 11th to 12th streets.
All of the above streets will be posted “No Parking,” with specific times, at least 24 hours in advance. Vehicles illegally parked will be subject to towing at the owner’s expense.
Free parking at the La Plata County Fairgrounds and Durango High School lots will be available. Free trolley rides between the fairgrounds to downtown will be available from 5 to 9 p.m.
Schedule changes
These additions and changes have been made to the Snowdown schedule of events:
The dart contest to be held at 5 p.m. Friday has been canceled.
Euchre will take place at 6 p.m. Wednesday. Registration will take place at 5 p.m. There will be no practice at 4 p.m.
“How well do you know y(our) wine?” has been moved to 5 p.m. Thursday at Four Leaves Winery, 528 Main Ave.
The Ignacio High School Travel Club will sell hot chocolate at 6 p.m. Saturday in the parking lot of First National Bank, 259 west Ninth St.
Rail Jam will take place at 6 p.m. Saturday at Chapman Hill. For more information, call Beth Vosika at 259-8669.
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