About 400 friends, family members, colleagues and students, both former and present, filled the Powerhouse Science Center on Wednesday to remember Chad Novak. The Escalante Middle School counselor died by suicide Sept. 16, and dealing with that kind of loss was a major theme of the gathering.
“His spirit is at peace now,” Loren Lapow, a friend and fellow counselor, said. “But for us, friends and family, the hard feelings, pain, grief, confusion are just starting. We all need to take very seriously what happened. We must never forget, and we must never let it happen again.”
Grief counselor Judy Austin shared advice about loss and healing.
“There’s no right way; there’s no wrong way, no ‘shoulds,’” she said. “The list of emotions coming up includes anger, regrets, confusion, pain or maybe numbness. You may be in shock. Some may feel like the tears will never stop; others may feel that they will never start.”
Student after student remembered his help during some tough school years and told stories about what he had meant to them: “I’m not good at school ... Sixth grade was hard for me ... Seventh grade was, without a doubt, the best year of school for me, thanks to Mr. Novak ... It speaks volumes that seventh-grade students are coming back ...”
They remembered his love of chocolate and the joy he took in being outdoors, on the Animas River or in the mountains.
Cindy Bonitz-Ryan’s son Nolan Reed, now a senior at Durango High School, had Novak as a teacher in the seventh grade.
“Nolan played football and the violin, and you can imagine the bullying,” she said. “When he realized Nolan had talent, Mr. Novak said we needed to think outside the four walls of school, and he arranged for Nolan to play with the high school orchestra when he was still in the eighth grade.”
Nolan is planning to go to college to study music after he graduates from DHS in May.
“Chad was the one who made that happen,” Bonitz-Ryan said. “That is Chad’s legacy.”
Lapow reminded the crowd that suicide is a problem in the community.
“None of us is prepared to deal with something like this,” he said, “We had two other suicides this week, so time is of the essence. We have to reach out to one another.”
abutler@durangoherald.com
