’Twas the days before Christmas and all through our towns,
Events of the past year brought smiles and frowns.
Traditions aplenty for this time of year;
So here is your poem with holiday jeer.
The rhymes will be tortured in meter and verse,
The Year in Review goes from bad into worse.
We fully admit that it’s utterly folderol;
So sit back and relish your yuletide doggerel.
Durango’s big problems were all self-inflicted,
But wholesale changes were quite unpredicted.
The voters were angry, the city mistrusted,
Elections were held and the balance adjusted.
With three of five councilors not all kumbaya;
they started to deal with flaw after flaw.
This did not sit well with Mr. LeBlanc;
Some people would say on his chain they did yank.
The manager cited more work to the fore;
Instead, Ron “retired” and shown out the door.
His home sale had prompted an ethics complaint,
A conflict of interest? But he claimed it ain’t.
And what did our wondering eyes did appear?
A budget quite sloppy and not so austere.
The numbers were padded with figures askew;
Departments have lots of explaining to do.
A ten-million “error” is cause for concern;
How could past councils have failed to discern?
With scrutiny heated, the budget laid bare;
The finance director? She’s no longer there.
The City Hall shake-up evolves and unfolds,
At least we have money to fix the darn roads.
With funding aplenty for Parks and for Rec,
We stupidly let other stuff go to heck.
And speaking of money, a major bright spot:
The funding for libraries approval was sought.
We’re keeping them open in rural locations,
The wisdom of voters deserves grand ovations.
The “campers” were messy, their squatting disgraceful,
But options for venues were oh-so distasteful.
The sheriff dispatched them to cliffs that are purple;
A plan for the homeless was simply dispersal.
The “housing-free” dwellers along road La Posta,
The beggars at Walmart, where they’re not supposta;
Solutions divisive, the options distinctly:
Treat with compassion? Ignore them completely?
The tourism sector is how town excels,
but what’s with the op’ning of all these hotels?
With total employment, a shortage pervades;
Where will they find all new bellhops and maids?
The county’s still broke and the people hate taxes;
They want gov’ment service, but here’s what the facts is:
With energy gone and free money no more
Remember this adage: You get what you pay for.
Add to your list of most-foolish ideas:
That you can start fires with bags of tortillas;
And selling your trusty ol’ snow-blow machine
Prior to winter of twenty-nineteen.
Let’s hope for a snowpack that’s way over normal
And good times for all and for parties informal
Take time out this season to lower all strife
To laugh at your foibles, enjoying your life.
So here’s to a new year all merry and bright.
The woes you encounter be few and so slight.
For readers, we offer the most warmest of wishes,
From yours truly here and from Action Line Mrs.
Email questions to actionline@durangoherald.com or mail them to Action Line, The Durango Herald, 1275 Main Ave., Durango, CO 80301. You can request anonymity if you please stop playing that Mariah Carey noisome holiday ditty. Enough!
