Many years ago, I spent some time traveling alone.

Alone is an interesting place to be. When experienced by choice, with the option of deciding when you’ve had enough, it can provide valuable space for thought, observation and if you’re lucky, an ah-ha moment.

Conversely, too much time with our own thoughts going unchecked by another’s perspective, or missing out on shared experiences can be ... lonely. Needless to say, connection is a defining characteristic of being human.

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Passionate about this topic? Look into the local organization, Creating Connections, https://chaclaplata.org/steps-to-creating-connections.

Or, meet new people while learning to water-bath can on May 23. Register at: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/328379210057.

For many, the last two years have been heavy on alone time. Or, at least lacking in diverse and quality social time. Game night and happy hour in our Brady Bunch squares was a nice alternative to nothing, but it wasn’t ideal.

Having empathy, imagine if you had been experiencing loneliness long before the pandemic? Imagine loneliness in the absence of social isolation but oddly, in the midst of a crowd?

It sounds like an oxymoron to be lonely in a crowd, until you know what lonely is. It can be caused by social isolation, which is measured by the number of physical contacts one has with others. But there’s more to it. Loneliness is less concrete because it’s a feeling, it’s subjective. It’s the perception that one is lacking adequate mental or emotional connection, no matter how many people are around.

Humans have always relied on pack mentality for survival. So as you may expect, the impact of loneliness is a concern worldwide. Did you know that Britain appointed a minister of loneliness? Better than an administer of loneliness. Though I suppose it raises the question, why is the issue of loneliness surfacing now?

COVID-19 may have been the kindling that sparked awareness, but again, loneliness has lurked for years, in people of all ages. Turns out, we’re never too young or old to need human connection, nor are we exempt from suddenly losing it.

Consider a young adult who recently left their family home and entered higher education, or a new career. Exciting as it may be, there is an initial experience of loss. A loss of connection from the people they care about, loss of confidence related to a new school/work experience, or loss of a place that feels like home.

Loneliness is felt by your teenager as they navigate self-identity while fitting in with their peers. It’s the family, new to the community, and challenged by a language barrier. It could be your friend acting as a caregiver for a parent; dedicating extensive time and energy to the job, at the cost of friendships and personal interests. Look across the street. It may also be your elderly neighbor who has experienced loss of vision, mobility or hearing; making it difficult to maintain or initiate relationships. For the time being, you personally, may feel content with the quality of connections you have. Tomorrow could be different.

If loneliness is rooted in human connection for the sake of survival, then perhaps it also means ensuring basic needs are met – nutritious food, shelter, clean water and a sense of safety. Without the subconscious fear of rejection by the pack, individuals can move forward with building social skills. They’ll engage with real people and give less to social media. They’ll participate in activities introducing them to like-minded individuals. Perhaps, there’ll be room for a little vulnerability, which can mysteriously open the same attribute in others, creating space for connection.

Socially connected communities bring diverse groups of people together. They create and maintain safe and inviting public spaces. They prioritize public transportation to improve access. Neighborhoods have mixed-use and mixed-income design, which includes communal space. They encourage communication between leadership and residents, and in rural areas, they extend the line to nearby communities.

These ideas are not an overnight fix, nor perfect. But they are worth exploring. Might I suggest an impromptu neighborhood potluck as a venue for starting the discussion? Who knows what will happen when we extend an invitation to connect, but it may just change your world.

Nicole Clark is the family and consumer science agent for the La Plata County Extension Office. Reach her at nicole.clark@colostate.edu or 382-6461.