Durango couple Courtney and Bobby Williams found purpose and growth – and six of their nine children – through adoption and fostering. They said other families can enrich their own lives by providing safe, loving homes for children in need.
Bobby and Courtney have three biological children – Eli, 19; Ayla, 17; and Owen, 15 – three internationally adopted children – Nagi, 23; Detcho, 21; and Addy, 13 – and three more adopted through foster care – Hannah, 23; Ezra, 7; and Nari, 5.
Nagi and Eli are enlisted with the Marines, Detcho attends Fort Lewis College and Hannah works and lives in Reno, Nevada. The others – including a 9-year-old foster child – live at the family’s Rafter J home southwest of Durango.
Bobby, founder of Whispering Pines Construction, said his pull toward fostering began when he was a child. He was inspired, in part, by his own difficult upbringing, and having neighbors who fostered.
“I had a little bit of a tough upbringing myself, and to see (that) family just be available for someone that was going through a tough time when I was young ... I always told myself, I hope I can (do that),” he said.
When Bobby met Courtney, he discovered her interest in fostering aligned with his own. They’ve been fostering for 17 years, including the past six in Colorado.
Nearly 80 children have come through the Williamses’ home since they began fostering, Courtney said.
Charmaine Summers, foster care and adoption supervisor with La Plata County Foster Care and Adoption Services, said the county has only nine foster families, including the Williamses, and one in Silverton – far short of what is needed.
Her agency worked with 25 foster children in 2024.
Statewide, 3,448 youths were placed with 2,471 certified kinship and foster families as of May 2024, according to the Colorado Department of Human Services.
Of those, 658 foster children were adopted last year.
The local foster system is reactive, meaning children must be placed quickly – sometimes in the middle of the night. Having foster families ready is integral, Summers said.
“It’s (about) trying to be prepared for the emergency situations, because we know they’re going to come, and they’re going to come pretty quick,” Summers said.
Several of La Plata County’s nine certified foster homes are at capacity, she said. Many are unable to handle children with complex needs or only accept certain ages. The biggest need currently is for homes willing to foster teens and children ages 10 and older, she said.
Bobby’s and Courtney’s home is designated as a therapeutic foster home – the only one in La Plata County – meaning they’re equipped to handle children with severe emotional or mental health needs.
Courtney, who also works with nonprofit America’s Kids Belong, said there’s also a need for respite homes – families willing to accept foster children on a short-term basis, which gives long-term foster parents a chance to rest and recharge.
Becoming a foster parent
Those interested in becoming a foster or adoptive parent can call La Plata County Department of Human Services at 382-6150 or visit https://tinyurl.com/yck7y975.
To learn more about the certification process or for questions about fostering, call county Foster Care and Adoption Services Manager Charmaine Summers at 382-6157.
It’s a common fear among potential foster parents that inviting foster children into their home might negatively impact their own children, Courtney and Bobby said. But they’ve had a positive experience caring for both their foster children and their own.
When the couple moved from North Dakota to Colorado six years ago – with seven children at the time – they thought they were done fostering. Their kids had other plans.
A young Ayla wrote her parents a letter – signed by her six siblings – urging Bobby and Courtney to keep fostering.
“I remember the placements that we’ve had, and I’ve just loved all the kids,” Ayla said of why she wrote the letter to her parents. “Knowing we had the room for it, and that our family was able to, (I was like), there’s no way that our family can stop doing this now.”
Nari and Ezra – then an infant and a toddler – were the Williamses’ first placements in Colorado. Both were later adopted.
“(Fostering) will affect your children, but I would say it ... largely affects them for the better,” Bobby said. “... Our kids have learned to come around some really ugly situations. They’ve learned how to navigate the uncomfortable (stuff), and it’s turned out to make them quality individuals.”
Courtney said the kids have requested certain boundaries at times – such as not accepting certain age groups for a period of time – and she and Bobby have worked to accommodate those needs.
Those interested in fostering need to be aware it takes more than love to succeed, Bobby and Courtney said – though that part is deeply important.
Foster parents must be flexible, prepared for emergency placements and ready to be knee-deep in paperwork, social worker visits and appointments – especially when a child first comes into their home.
While fostering can sometimes lead to adoption, reunification with biological parents is always the No. 1 goal, the couple said. Foster parents must be emotionally prepared to let go of a child, even after forming a deep bond – which can be bittersweet.
“It’s good to get attached as kids come and go, but it’s a challenge,” Bobby said. “It’s hard to not let that tear you apart too much. The system isn’t a perfect system all the time. I think we’re super fortunate in America to have the foster care system, but it’s messy. It’s hard. Just remember: Your role is to be a safe spot for each kid that comes (through).”
Support from friends, family and foster staff is an important part of fostering, the couple said.
“We’re Christians, and our church community supports us so well,” Courtney said. “Just last week, we had a little infant in the house for a couple days, and people stopped what they were doing to help us get (baby) clothes and do the things we needed to do.”
They also praised the support of Summers and the La Plata County Foster Care and Adoption Services.
“We’ve fostered in multiple states and multiple counties, and this is an amazing, amazing staff that La Plata County has,” Bobby said. “The support they give us to navigate those challenges (is great), and they make us feel like we have a voice at times, which is pretty special.”
Though fostering can have its share of tense, demanding and emotional moments, Bobby and Courtney said fostering has brought joy, purpose and connection to their lives.
“I get to meet new people all the time, hear their stories and learn,” Bobby said. “Honestly, I’ve probably learned more from (the foster kids) than they have from us. To be a part of so many people’s lives is pretty cool.”
epond@durangoherald.com
