Around 200 friends and family of the late and sorely missed La Plata County sheriff’s deputy Dan Bender attended a celebration of life at Bender’s and his wife Jon’s home on Saturday to pay their final respects.
Bender, 74, served in the 4th Military Police Company with the 4th Infantry Division in Vietnam. He also served as a deputy and spokesman at the La Plata County Sheriff’s Office for 37 years. He died on July 4 after battling pancreatic cancer.
Formal memorial services were topped off with a 21-gun salute, a presentation of the American flag and one final radio dispatch to Bender, which through the crackling static and white noise a female dispatcher’s voice said, “Rest in peace.”
The service was followed by attendees mingling and sharing fond memories of Bender.
Family members Rebekah and Sam Eggleston, Bender’s daughter and son-in-law, in addition to several of Bender’s grandchildren, shared memories and stories of Bender and how he impacted their lives and the lives of others.
Alan TeBrink, a pastor and former Colorado State Patrol captain, officiated services on Saturday. He borrowed Bender’s daily devotional and his bible to prepare his presentation. He said from going through each, it was clear Bender was a man of faith.
Dasha, Bender’s oldest granddaughter, said Bender was “kind, generous, creative, inspired” and, above all else, demonstrated the power of leading by example. He spent his life caring for others.
“One of my earliest memories is of him sitting on the floor with me, making up stories about princesses and dragons and a knight and a noble,” she said. “But the princess wasn’t the one trapped in the tower.”
Dasha said the princess shared her name, and with her magic sword and white stallion she rescued the knight from the tower, so Bender’s story went.
“Whenever I felt down, there he was with an email reminding me in his own quiet way of how proud he was,” she said. “ … Papa Dan would always be there to offer support.”
Military and sheriff’s office memorabilia were displayed for attendees to reflect on Bender’s long and storied service to his country and community.
Among the items were Bender’s certificate of service in Vietnam; a framed photograph of the United States Air Force Thunderbirds dedicated to La Plata County Sheriff’s Office; and numerous military and sheriff’s medals and patches.
A letter to Bender from American author Tony Hillerman dated Oct. 20, 1998, reveals Hillerman consulted with Bender for his crime novel “American Badger,” which was published in 1999.
In the letter, Hillerman thanks Bender for his insight into the 1998 Four Corners manhunt. He explained his fictional story takes place two years after the manhunt and involves a robbery of a casino operated by the Utes.
“If my story when finished includes a one-sided view of the real man hunt (sic), it will be one-sided in favor of the local police, such as yourself,” Hillerman says in his letter to Bender.
Sam Eggleston said Bender’s life was absolutely defined by service, and he speaks for La Plata County’s whole emergency services community when he thanks Bender for his service.
Eggleston said before Bender’s death, after a recent trip to the hospital, Bender told Eggleston he went to Vietnam as a boy and returned as a man.
He said anyone at the La Plata County Sheriff’s Office who worked with Bender was all too familiar with “Bendergrams,” which were long instructional emails or memos “pages and pages long.”
“If you have the patience to sit there and read the whole thing, it would have valuable, valuable information and it would also be probably entertaining,” he said. “But you have to have the patience to read all the pages.”
Eggleston asked attendees to bear with him as he tried his hand at delivering the last Bendergram. He broke into one of Bender’s old Vietnam stories, which he said Bender did not share often but did mention on occasion.
Bender was in Vietnam when he threw his first grenade. He he had never thrown one before, and he failed to pitch it over the top of a hill. It fell back down on the same side. Another man by his side grabbed him and they dove into a trench.
When the man asked if he knew how to throw a grenade, Bender said he did not, and the man took his grenades from him.
People in the audience laughed.
Eggleston said Bender learned the importance of proper management and use of weapons and tools, and he carried that lesson with him the rest of his life.
cburney@durangoherald.com
