What’s the deal with all these “Mercury” headlines? First, there was the guy spilling actual mercury all over. Second, the wonderful Katz family – of Mercury – gives tons of cash to 9-R and Animas High. Then third, the mercury scare at the illegal gold mill in Mancos. Then Mercury, formerly Mercury Payment Systems, is in the paper for its upcoming initial public offering (IPO). Is Mercury in retrograde or something? – Rick Feeney
Action Line knows very little about astrology other than being born under the sign of Cancer.
That, and the fact that wearing a zodiac-medallion chain with an open-collar leisure suit was the most regrettable fashion fad ever.
“What were people thinking in the ’70s?” Mrs. Action Line asked. “Did any guy ever score by buying some ‘foxy ladies’ a round of Harvey Wallbangers and using the line, ‘Hey baby, what’s your sign?’ Seriously!”
The days of Boogie Nights are over, but it’s still the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.
Therefore, Action Line consulted with experts in matters galactic: online astrology websites.
Surprisingly, there was unanimous agreement that Mercury was not in retrograde for most of November and all of December.
But just what the heck is “retrograde?” They say it’s a cosmic illusion of planets moving backwards across the cosmos.
The site, Astrology Zone, warns during such periods, humankind is “bombarded with maddening effects.”
You will “miss appointments, your computer equipment crashes, checks get lost, you find the car you just purchased during Mercury retrograde is a lemon. Or, you hate your haircut, the lamp you bought shorts out ... ,” the site opines.
However, regarding the four recent local headline events, only the two, small “M” mercury situations – the Durango spill and the Mancos mill – qualify as mayhem.
The other two capital “M” Mercury announcements – a generous gift and a forthcoming IPO – are positively positive. So piffle on planetary peregrinations!
The most recent Mercury retrograde was Oct. 21 to Nov. 10. The next one will begin Feb. 6, 2014, which is four days after the end of Snowdown. How appropriate is that?
Anyway, what if things were a little different? What if Mercury was planning to brew an IPA instead of issue an IPO?
They should. People in this town pay far more attention to new craft ales than to investment opportunities.
And how different would things have been if that homeless guy carried around a leaky jug of Mercury IPA instead of one filled with the liquid metal? Detox, the Transit Center and other facilities would just smell like stale beer.
Come to think of it, that’s pretty much what they already do.
H H H
On the northwest corner of East Fourth Avenue and College Drive is an angel of some sort, metal, about 18 inches tall. It’s been there for a couple of months at least. Who is this, and who is going to take care of her in winter? Maybe petition Sweetie Marbury for a dollhouse? – Sue
Maybe this errant angel is the latest addition to the city’s public art collection.
After all, the city seems keen to display odd metallic things along the road – the roundabout “Endurance” bicycles being a case in point.
The angel, like those bikes, cries out for adornments such as seasonal headwear or other festive bric-a-brac.
No decorations were on the angel on Friday, and likewise, the bicycles’ Santa hats had disappeared.
So much for public participation in public art.
Anyway, a quick check with the Public Art Commission shows no additions to its sculptural portfolio. The angel must be a rogue installation from a private benefactor.
As for its maintenance, chances for a doll “house” are slim given the city’s design guidelines, zoning requirements and review boards.
It’s best to seek an angel “accessory dwelling unit.” After all, the city thinks ADUs are simply divine and heaven sent.
Email questions to actionline@durangoherald.com or mail them to Action Line, The Durango Herald, 1275 Main Ave., Durango, CO 81301. You can request anonymity if you can explain why being sleep-deprived and with a hangover is a good way to start a new year.
