The holidays are a time of celebration, of tradition, excitement and connection. It is the time of year when people come together to celebrate as families and loved ones. Unfortunately, this is not the reality for everyone. For many, the holidays bring forth grief, as the loss of a loved one transforms the season from a time of joy to a time of heartache.
La Plata County suicide prevention services provide opportunities to walk alongside those navigating grief during this season. These services provide professional support as well as self-help opportunities for those who may not be ready to seek structured support.
International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day was held Nov. 23 at the Durango Public Library. Survivors of suicide loss gathered in a safe, supportive space to share their experiences, engage in self-care activities and connect over a shared meal. Although this event will not take place again until November 2025, there are other ongoing opportunities for support throughout La Plata County.
A Blue Christmas Service will be hosted at St. Mark’s Episcopal Church at 5 p.m. Dec. 15. This service will welcome all, especially those who are experiencing pain and grief during the holidays. For anyone experiencing illness, substance use disorder, loneliness, grief or any other heartache, this space will be open and understanding of your journey.
Beyond these holiday events, there are year-round and self-paced opportunities for those grieving the loss of a loved one. The Grief Center of Southwest Colorado is meeting the needs of bereaved members of the community and offers comprehensive grief support including individual and group therapy, anticipatory grief services, grief and trauma-informed workshops, a resource library, peer support groups for survivors of suicide and substance-related deaths. These services are offered to people on all walks of life regardless of beliefs, manner of death, relationship to the deceased and the ability to pay for services. The Grief Center of Southwest Colorado ensures a nonjudgmental, empathetic and respectful service offered in a warm, caring and professional environment.
Axis Health System is another important resource, offering direct mental health services including therapy, peer support, psychiatry and 24/7 crisis care. In addition, Axis offers care coordination services, offering support for anyone who needs to find a provider for their behavioral health needs.
During the holidays, grief can trigger intense emotions: shock, anger, guilt, despair, confusion, feelings of rejection and many more. Be sure to take your time and accept emotions while grieving in your own way. Be careful when using the word “should.” Try your best to be flexible and compassionate toward yourself as and others as you navigate this unexpected change. Try to manage expectations for the holidays and plan for events that are especially heavy or triggering. Connect with your family to discuss the holiday traditions you want to keep, change and let go of altogether. Doing this can help set realistic goals for your family’s healing journey. These steps are incredible tools for managing grief.
While grief can be paralyzing, do not forget that the holidays, while difficult, can also be a time of healing. Find space to open your heart to both grief and celebration. Surround yourself with support, do something for someone else in need, and find ways to continue the bond with your deceased loved one. Work with your family to be sure they are not forgotten while you continue to live your life through the holidays.
Don’t forget to look out for yourself just as you would your loved ones. Seek help if you or others are feeling hopeless or worthless, like a burden to others, unbearable pain, guilt, shame or trapped. Some behavior and mood changes to monitor are: increased substance use; withdrawing from family, friends, or community; saying goodbye to loved ones and giving away possessions; changes in eating or sleeping patterns; becoming violent or reckless; and having recent suicide attempt or episode of depression. These signs are not to be ignored. Call or text 988 to reach the behavioral health care line 24/7 or call 247-5245 to reach the local Axis Care Line 24/7.
Remember to expect the unexpected. Grief is unpredictable and will challenge you every step of the way. Remain patient and willing to adjust plans and expectations while remaining connected with friends, family and community. Each person experiences grief in their own unique way. However, it does not mean a grieving individual has to walk this journey alone.
Sydney Donnelly is the suicide prevention coordinator at the La Plata County Public Health Department. You can reach her by calling 828-8808 or by email at sdonnelly@lpcgov.org.
