Q: “Thanksgiving? I don’t eat turkey. Or wheat. Or sugar. So what do I do when invited for Thanksgiving dinner?”
A: I’d say eat something. Anything. And do it soon.
You’ve got to be hungry, not to mention how tough this must be, considering there’s probably not much glucose making its way to your brain. (Sorry, my willful fingers just banged the wrong keys.)
It depends why you don’t eat turkey, wheat and sugar. Allergies? Food preferences?
Half of Durango at any given time is avoiding sugar, but not usually for long, especially this time of year.
Not eating wheat comes as no surprise, either. I eat gluten by the bucketful, never realizing how great it tasted until I went without it once, for maybe five whole hours.
Whether you are on a no-carb diet, or you are vegan, vegetarian, lactose- or gluten-intolerant or an insulin-dependent diabetic, the thing you should not do is wait until you pull your chair up to the table to inform the hostess.
According to the Emily Post Institute, the correct etiquette is for the guest to advise the hostess of dietary restrictions upon receiving the invitation. Then the guest offers to bring something to share. The hostess is thus informed, and then relieved.
Don’t be surprised if the hostess says, “Bringing something is not at all necessary,” because her job is to make all the guests feel welcome and comfortable. Definitely look for this gracious response if you’re an especially lousy cook.
You can bet the hostess will be borrowing Moosewood cookbooks or groping online learning how to make gravy minus the flour. There could be lots of drama, depending on how comfortable and welcome your hostess wants you to be.
Seriously, it’s a tough question. Dietary restrictions seem to be a growing issue and might be one explanation for why few want to host dinner parties. Food allergies are an especially serious problem.
Unless you know your guests well, hostesses should probably skip serving peanut sauce, shellfish or mushrooms. Think vegetables and offer unadorned choices, when possible. Having a vegetable-based stock and useful staples such as garlic, olive oil and pasta could help in a pinch, but these aren’t the stars for this or any omnivore’s holiday.
There are a number of good gluten-free resources that offer dressing alternatives. Ask first, but I’d be surprised if any hostess wouldn’t be grateful for a second, gluten-free dressing or holiday dessert.
I haven’t personally spoken to His Holiness, the Dalai Lama, but I’ve read that if he is offered meat at a meal, he graciously accepts.
I agree with Post: Inform, and then offer to be helpful. Or eat what you can, when you can, which also includes raiding your own fridge either before or after the party.
Finally, if you want a return invitation, don’t make a big deal at the table about whatever you are. Nobody wants to hear about your embargo on gluten, GMOs, meat, dairy or anything else.
Q: “I like beef. Can I stuff a prime rib into a turkey?”
A: I don’t know. Can you?
I was surprised at how easy it was to thaw, serve and enjoy a roasted Turducken, the meat masterpiece popularized more than a decade ago by Louisiana-born chef Paul Prudhomme. But I wasn’t the one to coax the deboned duck and chicken to hang out inside a turkey. I just had to find a big enough weapon to crack open the box.
From the standpoint of getting the internal temperature high enough to have a safe and tasty meal, I can’t think of why you couldn’t stuff a deboned rib roast into a turkey. Turbeefkin?
Here’s a tip that’s lots easier than creating more Frankenfowl. Consider an attractive chilled beef appetizer that can be prepped in advance, such as carpaccio served with capers and shaved Parmesan. There are lots of good recipes online, but start with high quality beef filet, extra virgin olive oil and Reggiano Parmesan.
Guests who arrive mid-day will appreciate a holiday-appropriate appetizer that doesn’t require cooking, as will any hostess who needs to free up the oven and burners for the traditional, over-the-top Thanksgiving meal.
Q: “I always confuse giblets with gimlets. What’s the difference?”
A: I’ll take a gimlet over a giblet just about any day of the year. In fact, a gimlet might be a great substitute for an early morning Bloody Mary about the time you’re assembling mom’s oyster and cornbread dressing.
I’m referring to the classic gin and lime cocktail popularized in the 1960s when Rose’s Lime Juice made it easy for everyone to become a mixologist. Now, vodka is occasionally substituted for gin and most of us would rather have fresh-squeezed lime over bottled. A nice variation is to add either an infusion of ginger or lavender to the simple syrup that sweetens up this tart treat.
So what does this have to do with giblets? Don’t vary this cocktail by adding a giblet. Using offal would be just awful.
Giblets are the little surprises that come in the bag inside of the frozen turkey. Giblets can include the heart, gizzard, liver and other visceral organs. The USDA recommends giblets be cooked separate from the turkey. Dice cooked giblets and add them to the gravy or the dressing. The liver adds immeasurably to turkey gravy, but don’t include cooked liver if you decide to add giblets to the dressing. Liver’s distinct flavor can dominate the dressing.
I’ve had guests pick the giblets out of gravy, so now I sneak it past them by making a savory broth of the neck, giblets, aromatics, bay leaf, peppercorns and vermouth. I strain it and it becomes the basis for the all-important turkey gravy.
Then I take the “used” gizzards and divide them between my Lab and my Airedale, the only part of this too-rich meal they get at Thanksgiving.
On a side-note, dog lovers think they’re doing their pets a favor at Thanksgiving by serving them leftovers. It’s a bad idea because the fat content of this meal is very taxing on a dog’s pancreas. If you’ve done this in the past, stop. Instead, treat them with a small taste of the gizzards.
Q: I like the flavor and moisture when I brine my turkey, but it’s a big bother keeping it cold in a refrigerated bucket for 24 hours. I don’t understand how brining works, but if I just salt it – as in a “dry” brine, won’t that do the trick?
A: The short answer is yes, salting it liberally creates the same desirable effect.
Brining involves soaking meat or poultry in a 5 to 9 percent saltwater solution to retain the moisture that is usually lost during cooking. While it has been around for centuries, brining has been popularized during the last decade because many of us want to duplicate the deli-chicken, flavor-packed moistness we taste in grocery-store- brined, rotisserie birds, without having to resort to purchasing “enhanced” broth-injected poultry.
Food-science nerds often claim that brining happens because of the principles of osmosis – the movement of water across a semi-permeable membrane. But giving credit entirely to osmosis doesn’t hold up to testing. It is not osmosis that is making the turkey moister. It is that salt denatures or unravels protein strands, making the water molecules “fit” between the muscle strands. When moisture is trapped inside protein sheaths, the “salted” turkey typically remains moist after the heat (cooking) has sucked out the juices.
That’s important because food-lab testing indicates that a turkey cooked in a 350 F oven for four hours will lose about 24 percent of its moisture compared to a brined turkey, which loses about 15 percent.
Add that to the government’s recommended safe internal temperature for turkey: 165 F.
So for a moment, let’s blame the government.
There are people like me who ignore these safe temperatures and consume poultry cooked only to 150 F. That’s because I know that collagen coagulates when temperatures exceed 150 F. Cook poultry beyond 150 F and the breast will dry out. Guaranteed. One food scientist described what happens to the moisture content as being similar to squeezing a tube of toothpaste.
If you don’t feel like revolting against the government, then be safe, follow the guidelines and cook it until a meat thermometer reads 165 F and the bird crumbles. After all, that’s why we have gravy.
It doesn’t take long for any bird to overcook, so brining or salting – both of which help retain moisture – provides a buffer against leaving turkey in the oven too long, what most of us do.
Another alternative is to butterfly the bird and cook it splayed on a deep-sided cookie sheet. That allows for more even cooking. (But then you can’t display the ridiculous paper cut-outs on the drumsticks or circle the Dolly Parton breasted fowl with a ring of cranberries.)
Bottom line: food scientists have shown that brining retains moisture, but no one agrees on how it works, beyond giving credit to salt. If you choose to not brine, then salt the turkey inside the dry cavity and on all surfaces to resemble a light snowfall. Allowing the bird to “air dry” in the fridge for eight hours helps create a crispy skin. Finally, all meat should rest before carving.
If you do brine, keep these tips in mind: Never used an enhanced or injected bird. Be certain that the salt and sugar are dissolved completely in the right amount of liquid. Follow a recipe. A brine that contains sugar will help caramelize the skin. Some cooks add aromatics, bay leaves, cloves, garlic and cider.
Most important, be able to keep the completely submerged bird in a non-reactive container below 40 F at all times. Unless you have a walk-in cooler, space constraints could mean buying a turkey that weighs less than 12 to 14 pounds.
Want to try something different this year? Check this out: www.virtualweberbullet.com/turkey6.html
kbrucolianesi@durangoherald.com
