Dear Abby - The Durango Herald

Middle-aged daughter hasn’t left nest

DEAR ABBY: My husband passed away two years ago. I hope you can give me some advice on how to deal with my 53-year-old daughter who never left home. We generally get along well. She does fre...

DATE: Nov 19, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Beau keeps presence on dating sites

DEAR ABBY: I am a widowed woman who met a gentleman online two years ago. We met in person and get along really great. Everything seems perfect, but my girlfriends keep telling me they see h...

DATE: Nov 17, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Wife is second-class citizen in own home

DEAR ABBY: I have been married for five years. My husband and I are both past middle age and have been married before (me twice; three times for him). For much of our early marriage, my husb...

DATE: Nov 15, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Reader: Get busy living

DEAR ABBY: I read the letter from the woman who is feeling alone at 66 and pondering the purpose of life (“Living Life in Texas,” July 25). Assuming she’s in good health, she’s a spring chic...

DATE: Nov 15, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Mom fears for daughter entering workforce

DEAR ABBY: My daughter is about to turn 14 and wants to get a job. We just found out that in our state, 14- and 15-year-olds can work if they get a permit. I’m very concerned. I tried negoti...

DATE: Nov 10, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Custom still best way to say ‘thanks’

DEAR ABBY: I was taught to write handwritten thank-you notes when I received a gift. Over the last few years, my gifts have been acknowledged with a brief text, Facebook post, a photo or not...

DATE: Nov 8, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Marriage raining on music man’s parade

DEAR ABBY: I’m a middle-aged married man and the father of two. Although I work as a banker, I’m also an aspiring pianist. I have practiced two to three hours a day for many years. My music ...

DATE: Nov 5, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Widow AWOL after new romance

DEAR ABBY: My dear friend “Rose’s” husband died five years ago, and since then she has struggled with grief and loneliness. She immersed herself in her church, friends and family. We usually...

DATE: Nov 3, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Dating life a roller-coaster ride

DEAR ABBY: Since my divorce, I have started dating again. I was seeing a firefighter until I realized he was married with kids. Yes, I was angry with him for hiding the truth from me from th...

DATE: Nov 1, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Ex-wife’s snub saddens father

DEAR ABBY: I just attended my son’s wedding. He married a wonderful woman, and I couldn’t be happier for them. However, I was not acknowledged during their wedding reception, which deeply sa...

DATE: Oct 29, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Brother’s anger hits at home, work

DEAR ABBY: I have a brother I can’t seem to get along with anymore. Sometimes he’s OK, but most of the time he’s not. I visited him recently for a cookout, and it wasn’t good. He got into an...

DATE: Oct 29, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Discomfort with trans coach could derail fun

DEAR ABBY: My 9-year-old daughter, “Kennedy,” plays volleyball. One of the assistant coaches is a transgender woman. I had known about the coach before Kennedy started playing. Although I’m ...

DATE: Oct 25, 2022 | CATEGORY: Dear Abby

Bayfield High School students win big in robotics, animatronicsSelf-designed projects catch attention among competitors’ kit-made creations at state championship

Bayfield High School students took home big wins last month at the Denver Technology Student Association State Championships. Eight students from BHS brought back team wins, including first and second place in the robotics category, first place in animatronics and a top-five finish in System Control – three of more than 35 technology-related categories students could enter in the competition. The Bayfield Technology Student Association – or TSA – chapter was also awarded a Gold Chapter of Excellence Award. “We are extremely proud of these kids,” said Brian McDonagh, an engineering instructor and TSA adviser. TSA is “a national nonprofit career and technical student organization of middle and high school students engaged in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics,” according to the nonprofit’s website. The organization focuses on supplying on-the-ground experiences to students to prepare them for careers in the STEM and tech fields. The Bayfield School District has been involved with TSA for X years. Around X number of students from schools across Colorado competed at State. More than 1,500 students competed at State, McDonagh said. What set Bayfield apart from its competitors, he said, was the students’ made-from-scratch designs. Many competitors used premade VEX Robotics kits for their creations, McDonagh said, whereas his students designed, 3D printed and assembled every piece of their projects from the ground up.

“Ninety-nine percent of every other schools, they buy a kit and they assemble the kit, kind of like Legos,” he said. “... And our kids, they design it completely from scratch and customize everything, and they just dominate.” Seniors Reese Appenzeller, Parker Perkerewicz and Wyatt Hefner took home first place in robotics for their remote controlled vehicle named RAM ROD, which the team has been working on and improving for around two years. RAM ROD won second at last years’ State competition.

Seniors Kylynd Parrish and Tyler Berry and juniors Julian Polanco and Taj Houpt also entered a remote-controlled vehicle in this years’ competition and took home second place. The robotic vehicles had to prove they were hardy and well-programmed by navigating a complex course filled with obstacles and tasks. Two students, each holding a remote, had to work together to dual-operate one robot. The robots were carefully designed by the students to navigate the course smoothly and effectively, McDonagh said, and practice routes were set up in the classroom before the group headed to Denver for the competition. “Every element of the robot – for example, the drivetrain, the gears, the material used for the wheels – they’ve all been designed and carefully chosen,” he said. “And (the students have) iterated on their designs multiple times to get the most effective design.” Kylynd, Tyler, Julian and Taj, along with classmate Riley Murphy, were also behind the school’s first place animatronics creation – a scale model theater depicting the 1969 Apollo 11 moon landing.

The small theater featured self-parting curtains, a moving astronaut floating through ‘space’ and a spacecraft that gently came to rest on the surface of the faux moon. Audio of Neil Armstrong’s famous quote – “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind” – was programmed into the theater and played over the scene. Like the process for making the robots, each step of designing, assembling and programming the scene was done from scratch by the students. The project took several months to complete, the team said, and involved a fair share of complications, setbacks, trial and error, and sleepless nights. The animatronic required last-minute adjustments right up until the day of competition, the team said. “It took a lot of failure and redesign – a bunch of iterations – to finally get to our final product,” Taj said. “… With the stage design, the one you see right now, it used to be half the size, but to account for the hydraulics, we had to double the size.” . And originally, it was going to be a movie stage, kind of making fun of the idea that the moon landing was fake – the conspiracy – but since we doubled the size, we actually made it based off the NASA Vehicle Assembly building.” The animatronic creation wasn’t the only project that saw failures as well as wins leading up to State, McDonagh said. “They have built (these projects) several times, stress-tested various elements of systems. … They’ve blown things up by accident, through trial and error, and learning the hard way about voltages, and the importance of using the right voltages,” he said. In addition to catching the attention of State judges, the students’ made-from-scratch designs helped cultivate an inside-out understanding of what was being built, and what needed to be changed and adapted when issues arose, Wyatt said.

“(At Bayfield,) we have that drive of, ‘It’s better if you do it yourself,’” he said. “Everything we did in-house. The motors on here, it was me who soldered these all together. … I think that’s why we’re so successful, is because we know the insides and outs of our robot. We have that drive to make everything better.” Bayfield’s TSA students said the win proved that students from small, rural schools can be just as successful as those from bigger, more metropolitan districts. “All these other schools in the Denver area that have ‘STEM’ or ‘Tech’ in their names (competed), and we single-handedly got first and second podium,” Kylynd said. “We can compete, you know? We’re just as good as all these other schools with ‘STEM’ (in their name,) if not better.”Wyatt agreed. “ (At State) they saw what we're doing here at Bayfield,” he said. “We're a school with 400 kids, right – and then we go and just pump out that success. Especially in robotics, that's something that you wouldn't quite (expect), especially against 5A schools.” Students from the Bayfield and Durango school districts competed in the TSA regionals in Durango in January. The Bayfield state champs will be going to the national competition in Washington in June. Fresh off their wins, Kylynd, Tyler, Julian, Taj, Riley, Wyatt and Reese are already looking forward to how they can improve their creations for Nationals.

Improving the strength of the remote-controlled robots and working on making the animatronic creation look more lifelike are on the to-do list before June, Taj said; but the group is also taking time to celebrate their accomplishments and express gratitude for the mentors and faculty – like McDonagh, Principal Jason Wayman and Vice Principal Andy Duffy – who helped them achieve their wins. “(We’re) so proud, and we’re extremely thankful for the people that have helped us,” he said. epond@durangoherald.com

Self-designed projects catch attention among competitors’ kit-made creations at state championship

Photos: Demons track and field hosts Durango Dust Off meet to begin season

Photos: FLC men’s basketball wins RMAC playoff game against Adams State

Body camera footage released in fatal officer-involved shooting north of DurangoNew Mexico man holding bat and ax handle ran at deputy, video shows

Body camera footage from a November officer-involved shooting on U.S. Highway 550 north of Durango has been released by the La Plata County Sheriff’s Office.The footage shows Ernest Marlin Pino III, 31, of New Mexico, running toward La Plata County Sheriff’s Deputy Dillon Irwin while holding two wooden objects seconds before the deputy fired five shots at Pino. The objects Pino was holding were a baseball bat and an ax handle, according to reports from law enforcement and a decision letter from District Attorney Sean Murray.Pino suffered injuries to his heart, left lung, esophagus, stomach, small intestine, right iliopsoas, ribs and vertebrae, according to an autopsy report from the La Plata County Coroner’s Office. He was pronounced dead at the scene.After reviewing the evidence – including body camera footage, witness statements and law enforcement reports – District Attorney Sean Murray determined the deputy would not face criminal charges.“Having reviewed the facts and evidence in this case, my office concludes that a reasonable person, confronted with the same facts and circumstances, would believe that it was necessary to use deadly physical force to defend himself or the other persons present from Mr. Pino,” Murray wrote in the decision letter.The shooting occurred at about 2:50 p.m. Nov. 4 in the 28000 block of U.S. Highway 550, about 2 miles north of city limits. Officers were responding to a domestic violence call, according to scanner traffic and statements from law enforcement.Pino was reportedly driving a car “erratically” while hitting his fiancee before the shooting. She was calling for help out the window, according to the decision letter. In the video, Irwin, with his gun drawn, repeatedly orders Pino to drop the weapons while yelling at Pino’s fiancee to come to his side.“I ain’t droppin (expletive),” Pino repeats several times.As Pino’s fiancee starts moving toward the officer with her hands up, Pino begins running toward Irwin and his fiancee with the two wooden objects in his hands. Pino takes five running steps toward the officer and his fiancee while holding the weapons before Irwin shouts, “Get down, get down.” Pino continues running, taking four more steps before Irwin fires his gun, immediately sending Pino to the ground. About 17 seconds elapse between the moment Irwin exits his patrol vehicle and the moment he fires his gun. Durango Police Department officer Kaden Taulli simultaneously fired his Taser at Pino, according to the DA decision letter. A Durango Police Department spokesperson told The Durango Herald that Taulli deployed three probes from his Taser at Pino, which delivered one shock.The moment Taulli deployed his Taser is not visible in the footage recorded by Irwin’s body camera.A resident at the scene reported seeing a person in a white shirt who she believed was Pino waving his arms with nothing in his hands before shots were fired.Pino’s fiancee is wearing a light-colored shirt in the video while running toward Irwin with her hands up – which were empty – just before Pino was shot, which may have contributed to witness confusion and differing accounts of what occurred.The video was partially redacted by the Sheriff’s Office, with Pino’s body blurred after shots are fired. The moments leading up to the shooting, and the moment Irwin fired his gun five times at Pino, were released unredacted. The Herald removed an intermediary section of the video that depicts sensitive footage of Pino’s fiancee.Irwin and several other law enforcement officers attempted to treat Pino’s bullet wounds about two minutes after he was shot and began administering CPR about six minutes after shots were fired.

“Chest seals are utilized to maintain pressure inside the chest cavity, helping with proper circulation during chest compressions,” said Chris Burke, La Plata County Sheriff’s Office spokesman, to the Herald in an email. “Deputies are taught to render first-aid once the scene is safe to do so,” he said. Irwin was initially put in handcuffs before officers began patching his wounds, but the cuffs were removed just before CPR began.An ambulance arrived about nine and a half minutes after Pino was shot.

Coughing and wheezing could be heard several times as officers worked on Pino, but the blurred redaction made it difficult to determine whether the sounds were coming from Pino or an officer.An automated external defibrillator was applied to Pino shortly after CPR began, but an electronic voice from the device could be heard saying, “Evaluating heart rhythm … No shock advised.”Based on the footage, CPR was performed for nearly four minutes before the ambulance arrived and for at least five minutes after it arrived.According to an autopsy report from the La Plata County Coroner’s Office, Pino had a blood-alcohol level of 0.229 at the time of his death – nearly three times the legal driving limit – and tested “presumptively positive” on blood and urine cannabis tests, according to the report.According to a police interview with Pino’s fiancee, he was on probation for an assault case in New Mexico at the time of the shooting and had previously been diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder, schizophrenia and manic depression. He did not take medication for his conditions, she said, and instead “self-medicated” with alcohol.“In the previous months our community witnessed three separate domestic violence incidents resulting in death, this case is one of them,” Burke wrote in his email to the Herald. “If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please report it to local law enforcement. Domestic Violence is not an isolated incident, the abuse can occur for months or even years. The earlier the violence is reported, the sooner we can help victims and families with the resources and the work to help keep them safe.” epond@durangoherald.com

New Mexico man holding bat and ax handle ran at deputy, video shows

Photos/video: Silverton Skijoring

Photos: Durango High School home boys and girls basketball games Both Demons squads lost to Fruita Monument on Friday

Both Demons squads lost to Fruita Monument on Friday

KOB 4 interviews mogul skier, his father and first coach

Photos: Snowdown Light Parade 2026

Snowdown Light Parade offers a journey back in timeDinosaurs, prospectors and chain saws, oh my!

Main Avenue was transformed Friday into a menagerie of whimsy during this year’s Snowdown Light Parade.Dinosaurs, prospectors, yards of flannel, covered wagons, a yeti, humanoid trees, a healthy dose of Victorian garb, Jazzercise cowboys, chain saws, bubbles, bears, horses, rams, chickens and motorcycles all helped paradegoers get into a party mood and go back in time for this year’s Snowdown theme: Uniquely Colorado – Then and Wow!The parade, hosted once again by Purgatory Resort, gave participants the opportunity to time travel to celebrate Colorado’s 150th anniversary and all that makes the state special.Some floats leaned heavily into the theme of celebrating Colorado’s history and quirks – one with an intricately decorated Victorian room, another featuring a mega-sized miner working a steaming rock pile, and one sporting the infamous Denver International Airport mustang, Blucifer, among others.

Others – like a mobile boxing ring and pickleball court, a drivable airport luggage cart filled with suitcases and a vintage Barbie car – gained attention through their eye-catching presentations and quirky energy.Though many themed floats leaned into 19th and 20th century Durango and Colorado history, some – including the La Plata Electric Association float – brought paradegoers back millions of years to the age of the dinosaurs.Purgatory has hosted the light parade for more than eight years, said company spokesperson James Graven.Purgatory Marketing Director Matt Ericksen told The Durango Herald that hosting Snowdown is a way for the company to show its support for the festival and the community.“Hosting the Snowdown parade is a way for us to support a long-standing Durango tradition and the community that has supported Purgatory for so many years,” Ericksen said. “Especially as we mark our 60th season, it feels important to stay connected to the events that make this place special.”

Durango resident Emma Tomlinson has attended the parade for more than 30 years. Her 4-year-old son, Axel, has been coming to the parade since he was born.“People just love it – it’s a tradition,” Tomlinson said. “I think during the winter, we’re all at our low, you know? It’s a great pick-me-up. You get out and you see your friends and you invite your family, and people are just happy. It’s a great time to just celebrate and be with each other.”

Axel said his favorite part of the parade was the fire-breathing propane tanks released from hot air balloon baskets ferried on trucks.The parade concluded with a drone show depicting images from Colorado’s history – a new addition this year – and an impromptu appearance from anti-ICE protesters.

The protesters, a smaller cohort than one that filled Main Avenue only hours earlier, filed into the parade route just as the procession was coming to a close with homemade signs in tow, chanting, “stop deportation.” epond@durangoherald.com

Dinosaurs, prospectors and chain saws, oh my!

Durango High School students trade class for anti-ICE protest‘Skipping our lessons to teach you one,’ read one sign

About 200 Durango High School students and a smattering of supportive community members marched down Main Avenue on Friday during school hours to protest recent U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement activity. Students intentionally missed two class periods to join the crowd, which made its way through DHS property, south to downtown Durango and back again. A handful of class absences can lead to disciplinary action – but many of the students marching on Main said they were more than willing to take an attendance strike to be at the protest.

“It’s our friends out there (being taken),” 11th grader Lila Scherer-Sickler said as she marched alongside her classmates. “It’s people we know in Durango, and we just felt like, as kids, we don’t often get an opportunity to have our voice out there, and we just took the chance. A bunch of us are missing AP classes right now, (but) I think that the opportunity to get your voice out there is more important.”

The crowd of high schoolers touted handmade signs and called out chants like, “We want justice, we want peace, we want ICE up off our streets.” Many passing cars and passersby honked, smiled and waved at the crowd. Some put up their middle fingers or shook their heads. One student said a classmate intentionally blew exhaust at protesters from his car as the crowd was leaving the school. Durango School District spokeswoman Karla Sluis told The Durango Herald in a written statement that the school was aware of the protest and “coordinated communication with local law enforcement and nearby facilities” before the march.

“We acknowledge students’ First Amendment right to express their views,” she wrote. “At the same time, we are responsible for students’ safety and education. Usual attendance policies apply, and we encourage respectful dialogue through planned, supervised events.” The protest comes after several months of rising tensions between ICE and U.S. citizens, in Durango and nationwide. A father and his two children were detained by ICE in October in Durango, despite having an open asylum case, and a man who had lived in Durango for 22 years was arrested in the city on New Year’s Eve. According to reporting by The Guardian, at least eight people have died in dealings with ICE less than a month into the new year – including Minneapolis residents Renee Nicole Good and Alex Pretti, who were shot and killed by ICE agents weeks apart.

Other people killed in interactions with ICE this year include Luis Gustavo Núñez Cáceres, Keith Porter Jr, Geraldo Lunas Campos, Víctor Manuel Díaz, Parady La and Luis Beltrán Yáñez-Cruz, according to The Guardian. Eleventh grader Finn Hughes said he participated in the walkout because using his privilege as a white U.S. citizen is important. “These are abhorrent kidnappings, and they’re happening not just in Durango, but around the nation,” he said.

Durango resident Barb Day was one of the community members who joined the protest in support of the students. She brought along a repurposed sign she used in 1968 to protest against the Vietnam War. “We have this brutal masked secret police that are just breaking all of our constitutional rights, and people are dying,” she said. “My parents were in World War II – my dad was in the Navy, and my mom was a combat nurse – and I know what my parents fought for. And this is just so wrong. We’re losing decency.” Liza Tregillus of the Apoyo Immigrant Partner Team also joined the protest in support of the students who marched. “I’m very proud of them, and I think (they’re out here) because they’re losing their own friends, and their own friends are terrified,” she said. “I feel we’ve lost our democracy after 250 years, (and) we need young voters.”

Tregillus has worked closely with many immigrants in her line of work, including the father and two children – Fernando Jaramillo-Solano and his 12-year-old daughter and 15-year-old son – who were detained by ICE in Durango late last year. The family opted to self-deport back to Colombia after a month in the South Texas Family Residential Center in Dilley, Texas, but told the Herald in January through Tregillus that they feared for their safety back in Colombia. One student, ninth grader Owen Holland, said he had a connection to the Jaramillo-Solano family. “I have a friend who lived here, from Mexico, and he was friends with them,” he said. “And it was like, really bad for my friend. It was really bad. It’s so much different than people make it seem.”

Tregillus said the tone of a protest is important, and that leading with curiosity and solution-based efforts – rather than confrontation – can make a difference. She said chants and signs that put the focus on immigrants being neighbors and friends, versus those that are meant to demean ICE or its agents, is one way she feels protesters can use their voices with intention. Many of the immigrants she works with are fearful that protests with tones that attack ICE agents may make conditions worse for them, she said. “From the immigrants, they would appreciate that our protests not be negative,” she said. “Many of them come from cultures of respect toward authority, and they’re frightened. ... They would rather we stick to a different tone. I talked to an immigrant (who had been detained by ICE), and he said every time there were protests outside when they were in lockdown, they were punished.” ICE did not immediately respond to a request for comment Friday. Students returned to their classes after the protest, and the demonstration remained peaceful, with no pepper spray or rubber bullets deployed, nor any heavy police or ICE presence in sight – unlike some other recent protests in Durango. epond@durangoherald.com

‘Skipping our lessons to teach you one,’ read one sign

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Beau keeps presence on dating sites

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Reader: Get busy living

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Custom still best way to say ‘thanks’

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Ex-wife’s snub saddens father

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